The most well dressed paramedic I’ve seen in my entire fucking life.

When I can’t get 5 stars on a 24h job. 
My life
  • Friend: Hey, do you want to go the party with me?
  • Me: Sorry, I have a photoshoot at Pop Glam...


Bae: Babe, come over

Me: I’m playing Kim K Hollywood

Bae: My parents aren’t home

Me: I literally just got a call from Simon

  • me: *is about to fall asleep*
  • me: no
  • me: i mustn't
  • me: i'm in the middle of a 3 hour photoshoot
Anonymous asked:
Post a pic of your cum in your hand

call me super glue cause holy shit do i get attached

(Source: straighthater, via equisollux)

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